Cullen's Twisted Sex Education
by 123Meaghan
Summary: Esme realized that her children are having to way much sex and calles a family sex class. What's the worst that could happen? M for Sexual Referance and Slight Language PLEASE READ AND REVIEW! THANKS
1. Chapter 1

**R&R. If you have any ideas either PM me or leave it as a commet, Constructive Critisim Welcome. Thanks for Your Support!**

** - ^*~Meaghan~*^ -**

**Esme's POV**

How long could all of this last? All of my children had been in their rooms since seven, I looked at the clock. It was midnight, I wonder how my children do it for five hours. Well, Rose and Em get pretty creative, I get scared every time I have to clean their room. Every thing in their has either been in Rose, Emmett has been on, Licked, Or been in either one of their butts, Eww. I think Edward and Bella were more mature about this, Still seeing sex as a special bond, Wonder how long that will last. Alice and Jazz aren't horrible, But they do have a closet full of outfits I couldn't picture any of my children in and Alice had some fascination with toys, I really don't know why. Finally, Here come's Bella, Edward, Alice, And Jasper. Rose would be at it all night, Oh well.

**Bella's POV**

Oh My Gosh. That felt so good, I can't believe that was five hours, It felt like two seconds. I bet Alice and Jasper had a good time, Especially because Jasper brought Alice one of her favorite presents, But in Alice's hands, It's a lethal weapon. A Red Bull. Even though it is mere human food, It takes horrible effect on her, She turns into a ticking time bomb. Kinda like Me and candy, or Emmett and beer. No wonder her eyes are still dilated and she is doing little jumps in place. "Finally, You all are here. I need to talk to you all, But first, I need a favor. Edward, Jasper I would like you to go into the death trap called Emmett and Rosalie's room and fetch them. Thank You" Esme said. Poor Edward. They were back down in a minute with Rose and Emmett, Who both had major sex hair and very little clothing on. "Now" Esme Started "It has come to my attention that you have been spending much time in your rooms lately. I am glad you and your partner are showing how much you love each other in a physical way, But it has been going on to much. We all are going to have a family "Sex Addicts Anonymous" meeting. Okay?" "UHHHH" Everyone groaned, Edward and I don't do it too much, But I highly Recommend it for Em, I bet Edward would back me up on this one.

**Emmett's POV**

Not another sex class, It doesn't do anything but make everyone laugh and get horny enough that you really wanna do it afterward. All of us walked into the living room to find it transformed with a projector and desks. I bet Rose and I would have fun on those desks. "Shut Up, Emmett" Edward said. "How about you don't listen" I snapped back, He was such a know it all. "I'm so smart, To bad I have a horrible sex life" I said in my mind mocking Edward. I really hope he heard that. He just rolled his eyes. I bet he's jealous that I can do anything to Rose and she doesn't care. I even put a my crayon, Jasper's rubber ducky and Alice's Polly Pocket in her all at the same time, Bet he hasn't done that to Bella.

**Edward's POV**

"No, I haven't, Emmett, And I don't plan to do that" I said back. What kinda three year old puts a crayon in his wife, I mean really. We all sat down and Esme put the first picture on the projector, It read "Cullen's Sex Class". Fun. "Now, Do any of you have any questions before we start? " Carlisle asked. Emmett raised his hand, I already knew what he was going to ask. "Yes, Emmett" Carlisle asked. "What is the coolest thing you have put in Esme's pu…" "No Emmet" Carlile sighed. "Real questions", Emmet put his hand down. "Now, We are going to start with puberty. Will any of you please tell me what things happen during puberty" Esme asked. Emmett raised his hand, Of course. "Well, Girls grow boobs and You get way more horny. Oh, And your dick grows" He said, Obviously pleased with himself. "Okay. You forget that you get pubic hair." Esme said. "Rose and I don't" Emmett shouted, Everyone, including me, Looked at him. "If you get waxed when you're a vampire, It doesn't grow back", This would be a long day. I wrapped my arm around Bella's waist, But she did something a little more unexpected. Jasper must be really horny, Because I know Bella would have never grabbed my dick through my pants in front of our family. Esme had her back turned and I looked around. Alice and Jasper were making out and Em had one of Rose's boobs in his hand the other on her ass. Oh, Boy. Esme continued her ignored drawing of the female reproduction system, and Everyone else got a little busier.

**Esme's Pov**

Ok, I can't be sure but I really think I just heard one of my children moan. Think it was Rosalie. I turned around to see my children on the floor or in chairs or on desks naked. "What the hell are you doing" I asked. No one really stopped or paid attention for that matter, And I'm starting to feel horny now, Sometimes I really hate Jasper's talent, Probably had something to do with it. The next thing I realized was that I had been knocked over and my half naked husband was on top of me, Jasper got to him too. I ripped off my shirt and started sucking on me. It felt so good, No, I need to get everyone to stop. But I want him to keep going, Oh whatever. So there was our family, In the middle of the sex education class, and making love. In our living room, Then I started to hear some cheering in the background. But then I heard one of our sons, Emmett most likely, "Fuck him good, Mom". Oh My God, I pushed Carlisle off me and ran and put on clothes.

**Emmett's POV**

Ha Ha, I just saw my Mom and Dad fuck. Esme walked back into the room so I yelled out "Look, Mommykinz and Daddykinz made Lovekinz, Good Job". "Emmet, Your grounded" Carlisle boomed, "No Computer". Awww Man, Oh well. "Now" Esme started "Because that didn't go just as planned, I've got another plan. I can't believe I'm going to say this but we are all going to go camping but this will be different. We will all camp away from each other, Except the couples, And you have as much sex as you want." "YYYYYEEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!" Thanks Mom, What an awesome punishment. Even though it was the stupidest thing I've ever heard of, I like the idea. "This will hopefully get some of your urges out of your system. But I don't want you to go overboard, No destroying forest. We don't want a replay of Rosalie and Emmett's honeymoon number four." Ahhh, Honeymoon number four, Good times. "We will be packing tomorrow and leaving the next day, Now, We also challenge you to try to not have sex until we are there", I completely disregarded that. I hope Rose packs lingerie! Oh, and toys, Better make a list.


	2. Author Note PLEASE READ!

Dear wonderful Fan Fiction Readers, I** REALLY **need your help. I love this story I'm writing but I am having serious writers block. I have no idea on how to continue, and If any of you have any ideas please leave them in a comment or Private Message me. Every suggestion, Even a small one, Will help me be able to continue this story which I love so much. Thanks for all your support. -Sincerely, Meaghan


	3. FOLLOW PETER FACINELLI

**DEAR FANFICTION READERS, I REALLY HOPE YOU KNW WHO PETER FACINELLI IS. IF YOU DON'T, HE IS THE SUPER, CRAZY HOT MAN WHO PLAYS CARLISLE CULLEN IN TWILIGHT. HE AND ROB DEFRANCO HAS A BET ON TWITTER, IF PETER REACHES 500,000 FOLLOWERS BY FRIDAY(6/19/2009) AT MIDNIGHT HE WILL MAKE ROB DANCE IN THE STREET(IN BEVERLY HILLS) TO SINGLE LADIES IN A BIKINI WHILE WAVING A TWEET ME SIGN.**

**IF PETER LOOSES, HE HAS TO GIVE THE BACK OF HIS CHAIR FROM TWILIGHT THAT HAS HIS NAME ON IT TO ROB. BUT TO INCOURAGE YOU, PETER SAYS IF HE WINS, HE WILL GIVE THE BACK OF THE CHAIR(THAT ROBERT PATTIONSON ACCUALLY SAT IN, ALSO)TO ONE OF THE FOLLOWERS. SO GO TO TWITTER, CREATE AN ACCOUNT, AND FOLLOW PETER FACINELLI!!!**


End file.
